This tastes like…………

Posted By on January 11, 2017

Are you aware that people eat hummus, and then they buy more so they can eat it again? To me that’s like breaking your arm and then asking somebody to re-break your arm again.  But people also think that Coors Light is a quality beer.  This just goes to show you that there is no accounting for somebody’s taste.  Hey, you like your steak charred more than a resident of Oakland’s Ghost Ship?  More power to you.  You’re completely wrong of course and should never be allowed in public to mingle amongst the commoners, but it is still your choice.  In the words of the almighty Jimmy Buffett, “some folks like the taste of smooth tequila and others think that tea’s too strong”.  We like what we like and it may not be what everybody else likes.    See, I am actually still learning stuff as I get older and more decrepit.

When it comes to cigars, I can’t tell you if it tastes like a Spanish pear or is mild hazelnut with a pinch of nutmeg. Are we making cookies or are we smoking cigars here?  Now if something tastes like a Himalayan Yeti’s dropping after a solid night of binge munching Taco Bell, I can probably tell you that it tastes like shit.  Working in a cigar shop, Cigar taste I’ve recommended thousands of cigars to both seasoned smokers and newbies.  Some are home runs and some tell me it’s one of the least favorite cigars they have ever had.  After I key their car and piss in their gas tank, I politely try to reassure them that no two palates are the same and it’s the reason we carry so many wonderful cigars to choose from.  Can you imagine if you had to pick from the same 10 cigars for the rest of your life?  Of course when you get married you pick one and only one vagina for the rest of your life so I guess what could be more  F’n brutal than that?

Recall from your middle school heath class, the one that taught you to put on deodorant after gym and always wear a condom while in Vegas even when not having sex, you only really taste 5 things: saltiness, sweetness, bitterness, sourness and umami. No not Tsunami, umami.  It’s a Japanese word that basically means savory.  The rest of what you get from that delicious tobacco is the smells.  I’m not making this shit up guys, this is real science right here!  Think about how you enjoy your cigars and you will realize that you’re probably already doing things while puffing away to assist your senses in smelling just what is in that smoke.  You likely already retro exhale a bit to get a little smoke into your sinuses so you can pick up a some of the more than 1 trillion scents your nose can distinguish.  That’s a lot smells right there.  And in those multitude of smells, some you like and some you don’t.  That’s why some cigars you like and some you don’t.  By the way, Grape Swisher Sweets suck no matter how refined your palate is.  Let’s just leave it at that.

Taste WheelThat’s why we cigar junkies are always so concerned with what somebody is smoking. “What you got there?  Is it any good?”  How many times have you asked or been asked that question while chomping on one of your favorite sticks?  We want to know what somebody likes and why they like it so when we get around to trying that specific cigar, we have a baseline to work from.   Given the almost infinite choice of shapes, sizes and brands to pick from; you’re bound to find many you like and many you don’t.  Have you ever tried one of your favorite cigars in a different length or ring gauge and for some reason you just didn’t care for it?  First you gotta find a blend like and then a size you like?  No wonder getting into the world of cigars can seem like a daunting task to new connoisseur. There is so much to learn and so many to choose from that it may seem too scary to even get started.

In my never ending effort to expose you Neanderthals to new and exciting things, be sure to stop by Prohibition Spirits and Cigar Lounge this Thursday the 12th for a special 2 Cigar Event.  They will be featuring the Leaf by Oscar and Saga.  You are likely already familiar with Leaf, but Saga is new to the humidor and definitely worth a try.  I smoked the Blend No. 7 on Monday and it’s a pretty good stick.  You’ll need to try it yourself because I just freaking told you we all like different cigars.  Don’t you listen?

Feel free to share this invaluable knowledge I have imparted on you above to assist your friends in picking out a cigar they might enjoy. Then grab them by the shirt collar and drag them to our next Cigar Night at Prohibition Spirits and Cigar Lounge on Tuesday February 7th.

About the author

The Cigar Soldier is the founding father and President of The Brotherhood of the Leaf, an internet community of cigar enthusiasts and Northeast Wisconsin’s only true membership based cigar club. As the main writer for Cigar Night, his rants can sting, stir or inspire your emotions, as he leaves no topic of enjoying the cigar lifestyle off his hit list.


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