Summer Lovin

Posted By on June 16, 2010

After bitching about the horrible Wisconsin winter for the last few months in my posts, I figured it was time to share with you my appreciation for summer.  Maybe it’s because I can finally spend some time outside with my cigars instead of being couped up indoors, or maybe because it’s not dark at fucking 4:30 in the afternoon when I head home from work.  Whatever the reason, I just love this time of year. 

While I was riding around on the lawn mower the other day with a La For Dominicana Airbender (making my job an easier one to tolerate) I started thinking about what makes summer in our area so great and I did come up with a few thoughts.

lawnchair                             Of course just being able to sit on the deck in the evening with a good cigar is near the top of  my list since it really is one of the most enjoyable things I do.  I honestly don’t believe there is a doctor out there who could write a better prescription for stress relief than kicking back with a favorite stogy on your deck or patio with nothing but blue smoke to capture your attention.  Temperature extremes this time of year are like a  roller coaster with highs in the 90’s and lows in the 30’s in the span of two days and nothing seems more idiotic than driving to work with the heater on in the morning only to run the air conditioner so you don’t sweat through your dockers on the way home.  Backyard decks and patios have been part of the American culture for years and I’ll do my best to keep up that tradition as long as the weather permits.

Summer also allows me to tap into my primal caveman and cook with fire.  Fire Good!  The wife perfectsteakand I are carnivores to the core and there is just something about tossing a raw piece of meat onto the grill that makes me a happy boy.  Did I ever tell you how much I love cows because they are made from steak?  Cause I love steak.  Suck it PETA, I live by the kill it and grill it motto.  Backyard grills are being stoked up all across the country to kick off the summer outdoor cooking season and most of those grills will only see hot dogs and hamburgers or worse yet some fruit because all the testosterone has been sucked from those homes.  I’m all for a good burger but nothing tops picking out your own cut of meat, seasoning it up  and searing the hell out of it on a hot grill.  Just the thought of hearing that animal flesh hit the grates makes my mouth water.  After a few minutes on each side, those bad boys are ready to grace the table and the meat feast can begin.  As the head of the house I get the responsibility of  manning the grill as every red blooded American male should since it’s a right of passage you all should embrace.  Tell your wife not to thaw out the turkey burgers, go get some dead cow, fire up the grill and be a man this summer.  You’ll be thankful you did.  Of course a post steak dinner cigar should always be in order.

microbikiniI saved my favorite part of summer for last and if you don’t know what it is you’re either brain dead or into dudes (First Lady excluded).  That’s right my Brothers, the best part of summer is what passes for women’s swimsuits these days!  Now I have always had a wondering eye because I’m a pig deep at heart and I believe that if you don’t want to be looked at, you shouldn’t wear something so revealing that even my imagination can take a break since I can basically see it all anyway.  Women go to great lengths to keep their bodies in top physical shape so they can strut around in these tiny patches of cloth so I’m honoring their hard work and modern swimwear engineering by staring at them like a Priest eyeing up an alter boy.  In my younger years as a lifeguard I actually got paid to sit in a chair, twirl my whistle and look at girls all day long.  What a great job that was especially when there where huge family reunions in the park and they would come in to go for a swim.  I’m sure all those gals of yesteryear have matured into today’s MILFs.  Just my guess. 

As the days get longer the shorts get shorter I can’t help but appreciate the affects buns                             warm weather has on women’s wardrobes this time of year.  Consider yourself lucky that today’s modern gal fought for and has been granted the right to hit the beach in nothing more than some 15 LB test high knot strength line and less fabric than a bar napkin.  I know I’m grateful!  I recall seeing pictures of women’s bathing  suits from the 40’s and 50’s and am sure that compared to those cover-ups in the 30’s or worse yet from the roaring 20’s, they seemed minimal at best to the peering gentleman of those days.  Put those dresses up against the fashions of today and holy cow, Gramps would have a heart attack.  Worse yet, can you imagine those poor Muslim bastards whose archaic and chauvinistic attitudes force women to dress up in bed sheets and hoodies in middle of the fucking desert?  That would be the perfect place for gals to run around tanning beside tropical themed pools in nothing more than a tiny thong and string bikini top.  Great call Allah, I think western society and the big J.C. win this round.

Summer.  So many great things are associated with this favorite of seasons from music to drinks to vacations to cigars that I can’t fit it all into one post.  I hope that like me, you guys will take advantage of the great outdoors and enjoy a cigar every chance you get from the golf course to the backyard.  There are very few places left where a cigar smoker is welcome so don’t pass up the opportunity to burn one outdoors tonight and just enjoy your time with a close friend. 

Oh yeah, did I tell you guys what my favorite part of summer is?  God Bless America!


Enjoy the summer my Brothers,

The Cigar Soldier

About the author

The Cigar Soldier is the founding father and President of The Brotherhood of the Leaf, an internet community of cigar enthusiasts and Northeast Wisconsin’s only true membership based cigar club. As the main writer for Cigar Night, his rants can sting, stir or inspire your emotions, as he leaves no topic of enjoying the cigar lifestyle off his hit list.


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